Moving Forward

Again, I've turned into a blog slacker.

I just don't know what direction to take you in, little blog. Since I'm a mom and I haven't the slightest clue what the frick I'm doing as a parent, this sure as hell cannot be an advice blog.

I suppose it could be a "hey my kid did this so I did this" blog, and you can all read, laugh, and judge (but hopefully not report) me. Ha.

I'm not ready to even think about actively trying to have a baby. Though I do WANT another kid, preferably one made up of parts of me and my husband the idea of "TTC" aka Trying to Conceive, or paying any kind of specific attention to my cycle makes me have symptoms of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).

I don't know how I'll ever go back to that place. I have never prevented pregnancy since we left the realm of fertility treatments 17 months ago. But, I do not have much sex (thank you kids) and have just tried to not notice those weird small things like: cervical mucus. Early on I avoided my "fertile" time aka: watery and egg white cervical mucus. (If I'm speaking Dutch here go back about two years and you'll learn all about my fertility antics and research- which by the way did NOTHING for me).

Anyway....wow this post has gone array to a personal, akward place.

I did get an early Christmas present today: The girls new BIRTH CERTIFICATES came! They told us when we finalized the adoption (not even two months ago) that it would be six months at the earliest. So that's really exciting! The new birth certificates list their adopted names (we kept their first names but changed the spelling) gave them new middle names, one of them after my sister, the other after my grandma, and of course, our last name.

The best part? Under MOTHER it says ..... my name! And, under Father, my husbands. It's so weird, like we erased their past, and now it's like they were born to us.

Of course, they will know they grew in someone else's tummy. They will know age appropriately how we became a family.

I honestly still cannot believe we adopted two kids. We just (did a lot of paper work and stuff 1st) picked them up, brought them home, and kept them. It's crazy. Sometimes it still doesn't feel real. Well now these kids are pruning in the bathtub because I left them playing in there to write this....don't judge, I can see them.