The girls are doing well, they're definitely comfortable in our home, with our family, and are continuing to blossom into bright, sassy, limit testing, little ladies. I am honestly at a loss for words when trying to describe how our lives have changed to anyone.
In the words of Clark W. Griswold, "If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldn't be as
WHAT THE FRICK IS GOING ON?!
Oh that's right....we have two kids, they are preschoolers, and it happened so fast! I remember a time when I constantly whined at how long it was all taking. I was trying to embrace every girls night out, every Saturday morning I spent with my DVR, and every moment of my husband. For the most part I drank these moments up, and thank goodness, because so much of this is now just a memory.
The girls operate on an 80/20 agenda. 80 percent of the time they are amazing. I look at them and feel so much love, and hope for the future. I want to give them everything. The other 20 percent of the time, they are little heathens and I am pretty sure they were sent here to pinch my every nerve. I have yelled. I have said childish things back to them. I have grabbed them by their arms (ugh I HATED when my mom did that to me). I am a new mom. I am learning, my husband and I both are. I realize that the girls are also learning what it's like to be consistently disciplined and have set rules, and most of all, have a family, a mommy and daddy.
There are moments that I think I'm crazy for signing up for this. There are moments when I am pushed to the brink of my patience and I wonder how I'll make it another moment. But I always do. There are also moments where I think my heart is just simply going to burst because of all the love I have for my family. Moments when my heart breaks as I'm pulling out of the garage knowing that a whole day will go by before I get to snuggle them, or hear their laughs again.
I was talking to a friend recently and she was giving me a hard time about not keeping up on my blog. I told her that it is definitely a time constraint. But, it's also a tightrope of what to post. I will not lie and say this is a fairytale and every moment is bliss. It's not true and I'm not going to make other mommies feel like crap by my delusions. I also don't want to appear ungrateful. I begged for motherhood, and now that I'm here, I do feel guilty when I have a hard day and complain to my husband, or anyone.
The bottom line is, yes I am so grateful, and so in love. But motherhood is no joke. It's hard. I have NEVER been a patient person, but now, patience is my frenemy, and we're learning to work together.