Saturday, December 31, 2011

Goodbye 2011...

I cannot believe it's New Years Eve. I'm not sure where 2011 went. I guess all my elders are right (once again), the years go faster and faster each year we get older. I feel like I just blinked and we went from having an HSG (tube blow out) in January to waiting for our homestudy to be written now.

This time last year I was so determined to have a baby I walked around gritting my teeth. If you would have asked me then how far I would go I would have told you that I would max out every credit card, and take out every loan possible to knock myself up. Now, I'm in a much more calm, non teeth gritting state.

I am so grateful that finding out first birthmom opened my eyes to the world of adoption. I have met so many amazing people along the way that have given me their time, and opened up their homes and families to me so that I could see the miracle that adoption is. I am at peace with the losses I've endured, grateful that I could be a part of giving a young girl the option to be a parent to her unborn baby. I've supported friends through their struggles to get pregnant, one through her miscarriage and another amazing lady who finally became a mother by adoption just over a week ago.

Thought I have nerves about what is to come. I know that what ever happens, the child that I end up with whether s/he is born from my own body, or comes to my life through adoption, they are meant to be mine.

I can promise one thing, and one thing only: I will love them. And, when I finally reach the other side of this treacherous mountain, everything will make sense.

1 comment:

  1. Praying that this year will be easier and that you and your hubby become parents!